Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Unanswerable Questions




If you work in a hospital, can you call in sick?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance.

How come you never hear about gruntled employees?

What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?

If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

When sign makers go on strike, what is written on their picket signs?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

How can there be self-help groups.

Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?

If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?

Do hermits experence peer pressure?

How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't live there?

Why in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Why is the word abbreviation so long?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

What's another word for thesaurus?

Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

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